There are certain things I find to be completely frivolous and absolutely ridiculous. One of those things is Glitter Graphics. You know the pictures or phrases with little animated “glitter” on them, that annoying people post on Myspace comments. Once I see one, I immediately lose all respect for the person who posted it. It's a surefire way to get me to not like you.
I spent a good two hours looking through Pyzam.com and looking for the absolute worst ones:
We all know those people who put way too much time and effort in to what their Myspace profile looks like. Those people are generally lonely and/or fat. So, I suppose this one is a bit useful, (if you like looking trashy) in complementing someone's “page”. However, I must ask: Why is the Playboy bunny emblazoned on it? I simply do not understand. It is pretty clearly meant for a girl to use. So, I don't really see what the message his here. Is it “I love the fact that you have too much free time and I also love how Playboy objectifies women”? I certainly hope so.
This one made me laugh. Because honestly, no one cares about anyone's blog. I don't even really care about my own blog. Seeing as how I've neglected it for two months. I'd be a terrible mother. I'd forget to feed the baby for weeks on end, and constantly wonder of it's whereabouts. Seriously. Do NOT put me in charge of a baby.
Okay, back in Fourth grade, when Neopets were cool, everyone had an icon with one of these “doll” things. Basically, it was a picture of a horribly disproportionate girl, with the “ideal” body, and you would choose from a collection of “awesome” clothes to put on her. Then you would have a little caption that would say something like “Brown eyed baby booooo <3”, or better yet, *~*^DarkFairyPrincess^*~*. They were all so bad. This one bothers me more than normal, because it conveys that the person with this is more interesting, and "strange" than you. Let me tell you this: Everyone is weird. No one is more weird than someone else. We all have our little idiosyncrasies, and habits that make us unique. Also, being goth is not being unique. It's trying to fit a stereotypical mold. And to all you aspiring scenesters: YOU'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING THAT HASN'T BEEN DONE BEFORE. YOU'RE NOT SPECIAL. YOU'RE NOT STRANGE. YOU'RE JUST PATHETIC AND STUPID.
Now THAT'S something you want to advertise: being too ignorant to care about the future of your country. That's hot. I want people to know that the only thing I care about is getting intoxicated and listening to bad music. It's so uncool to be politically conscious.
You know what? You tell them. So what if your ass IS like whoa? They should just deal with it. Like, when you're trying to get by someone, but they won't move, just run your ass in to them. Or when you're walking by some desks, don't feel obliged to excuse yourself when you knock off everything on their desk. It's okay. Your ass is like whoa. And everyone should except it.
(North kids will think of Ms. Barat when they see this one.)
Do you WANT people to not like you. Because advertising that you are beyond high maintenance is EXACTLY what everyone wants in a potential friend. Also I have this theory, that if you say that you are something, then that is what you are. So clearly, being high maintenance is important to you, so much so that you felt like you needed a glitter graphic about it. This is clearly the impression you want to make on people: I'M A BORING ATTENTION WHORE WHO LIES ABOUT HER LIFE TO MAKE HER SELF FEEL BETTER. That's so awesome.
Oh dear. Lets go over a few things:
1)Horoscopes can be written by seventh graders. I would know.
2)Cancer is a really dumb name for an astrological sign. It's a life threatening disease. Not only that, but the sign is a crab. So us lucky early-ish June birthdays get quite a bargain.
So basically, people who believe in horoscopes are stupid. I promise. The stars don't say shit. “Fate” cannot be determined. I promise.
It was indeed a tragic accident that your negligent parents were so careless as to drop you in to a box of glitter. Not only is that a risk for concussion, it is also a choking hazard. If you ate that glitter, or perhaps inhaled it, you would have been in serious danger, aside from the head trauma. You claim to have been “shining ever since.” I believe that because of this horrible accident you may have a eyesight problem, that causes you to believe that your skin is, in fact, iridescent. In any case, I offer my greatest sympathies. As you stated, it's not your fault.
There is clearly a lot of love to be shown here. That safety pin says it all.
Keeping it real, hmm? What is the precise meaning on the phrase “keeping it real”? Is that what you would say to someone who has fictitious qualities? Does it mean that perhaps, I do not exist? Also, why is are the beloved characters from a children's book telling me to “keep it real?” They are not real, so why are they demanding my state of reality? I guess this is too existentialist for me.